Wednesday, September 27, 2006

And it's only 9:15 a.m.....

For some reason, the last two days have involved events rivalling the hysterics in an "I love Lucy" show. For starters, I received a package yesterday that caused me to have a laughing episode so severe, a lady came up to me to ask if I was ok. I showed her my "Crazy Cat Lady" action figure, wiped my eyes, and told her I was great then went off to work. Next was a play I saw about which I'll comment later. The rest of the comedy is provided by the lovely Miss Erin...

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF ERIN:

Upon waking she was greeted by the lovely Princess Emily who so independently wants to do everything herself, yet, dependently clings to Erin like duct tape on a very dry knee. It's a good thing she's adorable, otherwise, Beastly would be sent away. Next is Oscar the grouch posing as her son Ryan who vehemently refuses to get dressed for school. All the while growling and scowling as if he is a fat kid and someone is trying to steal his last twinkie. After a struggle, Erin finally has the children dressed and ready for the day. She looks forward to a peaceful and relaxing day off until she drops Ryan off at school. Ryan is getting settled in when the new African-American boy arrives. Upon seeing the child, Ryan freaks out and tells his mother he wants to go home. She is baffled by his behavior and asks him why. As only a child could, he tells her he is scared of the "way he looks" and points to the new boy. Erin is mortified and completely astonished. She consoles Ryan, tells him it is ok and then leaves and immediately calls her roommate to ask, "What do you do when your child doesn't want to go to school because he's scared of the little black boy?" After mulling over the topic, she rationally decides "I think I need to get some books." The girls agree to go to two different libraries to gather a selection of "diverse" children's books in order to give Ryan a little culture.

Erin returns home slightly distraught but eager to enjoy the rest of her day, which would have happened had the sheriff not showed up just in time to catch her getting ready to go to the gym. She sheepishly opens the door convinced he's come to arrest her for her unpaid speeding ticket. Emily runs screaming into the other room as he delivers a summons to Erin. Luckily, it's only for the foreclosure on her ex-husband's house since he was too smart to just sell it after the divorce. Erin calls the lawyer for information and happily discovers she had nothing to worry about. She thinks to herself...It's only 9:15.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ok. Honestly how many times have you put duct tape on a "very dry" knee? Has this simile been put to a test? I want to know just how clingy this little girl really is.

cupcake said...

If you'd like to join us for dinner one night, we'd be happy to have you so you can see for yourself.

Erin said...

Oh please do join us for dinner...it would be an evening you wouldn't soon forget. Not only is she clingy, but she could entertain you for hours.